I Trolled Myself
by FanGirl825
Summary: Late St. Patrick's Day one-shot fic. Terumi trolled himself. That's about it.
**So happy LATE St. Patrick's Day everyone! The day to celebrate green and be evil and who else to celebrate evil with than Terumi...Maybe the Joker but nah. Also there will be one of my OC's in this fic and she is also has her own story I'm working on please check it out. Well I have no clue what to say other than he trolled himself...Kinda, well whatever enjoy!**

 **Key-** 'thoughts'

 **Terumi P.O.V.**

"OH CHRISTMAS TREEEEEE OH CHRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-" I held the note and took a small break for dramatic effect.

"-STMAS TREEEEEEEE SUCH PLEASURE DO YOU BRING MEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH!" I could hear glass cracking all over the office as I walked down the halls greeting everyone with my squeaky, ear-splitting voice. I continued down the hall making crying babies look like amateurs. Until I passed a door that just wasn't having it.

"TERUMI FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IT'S NOWHERE CLOSE TO CHRISTMAS IT'S THE DAY BEFORE SAINT PATRICK'S DAY! NOW SHUT UP OR I'LL SHOVE YOUR BUTTERFLY KNIFES IN A VERY PRIVATE PLACE!" A very angry Relius slammed the door to his office right in my face.

"At least it's not April Fools day." Noel whispered when she walked by me.

"What was that Vermillion?"

"U-Uh...K-Keep up the g-good work Sir!"

"That's what I thought." I strolled back to my office and sat behind my desk planning out my day tomorrow.

"Perhaps I won't troll anyone...HAHAHEHEHAHA...I crack myself up." The rest of the day I sat around pretending to do work and went outside Relius's door and sang at the top of my lungs, then went home. I ate a dozen boiled eggs and went to sleep. In the morning I woke up refreshed. I rolled over to hear the phone ring. I answered it.

"_ello _ho is _t." I had lost my voice I mean of all the days for karma to kick in why the fuck today.

"Terumi your three hours late for work."

"I _on't giv_ sh_t. _elp l_st v_ice."

"Terumi, I don't have time for yet another one of your pranks."

"N_ _AIT!" I heard the phone click. I sounded like Arakune. I dragged myself out of bed, got dressed and went to work. My plan needed to continue.

As I people looked at me like I was the ghost of Michael Jackson. They got the ghost part right but...Not the Michael Jackson part...Vermillion walked past me.

"I like your hair Sir it's very...Unique!" What was she talking about I hadn't done anything with my hair. I ran into my office pushed past my assistant and looked in the mirror on my office wall. She didn't even look up from the folder she was holding.

"Ok, so you are interrupting tea with Rachel. Then terrorizing school children. Umm this one just says…'Ragna'…Hello, are you even listening you have a bi-" She took one look at me and burst out laughing, so hard she could not even laugh and, she just clapped her hands together like a freaking seal and fell on the floor slapping the ground.

"WHO DID THIS...IT'S JUST..J-JUST I LOVE THEM THEY'RE MY NEW...I JUST C-CAN'T JUST AAHHHHAHAHAHAH. YOU LOOK LIKE A THE GRINCH STARTED BALDING!" She wiped tears from her eyes and sat on my desk and started laughing again and fell off my desk. My hair was spiked up as it usually is while I'm in Terumi form but it was shaved into a balding look.

"Zoë _ost vo_ce _n't _alk."

"I'll just talk to you telepathically...Oh and let's put this on." She took out my hand and put it on me snickering.

'So what happened?'

'Well I woke up with no voice.'

'And no hair, HAAA.'

'I will call Relius in here.' She immediately straightened up, but three seconds later smirked and laughed even harder she finally caught herself.

'Who do you think did it _?'_

'It's obviously Relius _,_ remember yesterday when he yelled at me _.'_

'He probably snapped _._ '

'You be my translator _._ ' She rolled her eyes.

"What else am I good for?'

'You really want me to show you _._ '

"That's a picture I don't need painted in my mind...Oh God the mental images!"

"_et's _o!" She opened the door to the office allowing me to go first.

'Ok so what's the plan.'

'Relius will talk…'

'Ooh, I like the sound of that...Evil...Manipulation? Embarrassment? Secrets? Or "D" all of the above?'

'Ahh, I've taught you so much. You're gonna be a great villain one day.' She rolled her eyes.' As we stepped outside Relius's office someone passed behind us, Zoë was the first to turn back with her butterfly knife ready...But there was no one there.

'How many people are trying to screw you over.'

'To many for even God to count.' I opened the door and screamed "AHHAAA", but since my voice was gone it was more of a baby goat dying.

"Terumi what do you want?"

"Terumi has lost his voice and he says...That if you don't admit you fucked up his hair then he'll tell everyone in the N.O.L. about your little romance."

"I don't see the problem with his ha-." Zoë ripped off my hat and I kinda screamed and snatched it back. Relius laughed something I didn't even know he was capable of doing.

"Listen I don't know who did this but I might be able to help you look into it." Relius moved over to his computer and did something and brought up the cameras from the night before. I was being followed by Kagura. So it was him maybe he was still mad from the stripper-gram I mean who doesn't love a good stripper I didn't know gender mattered with him, and so what if I purposely sent Makoto in there to kick him in the balls...Not so bad-Yeah I can't even lie to myself.

"_hanks _elius." We barged into Kagura's office something I immediately regret. As soon as we came in one of the secretaries that work in the front ran into another part of his office half-dressed slamming a door.

"Hey baby wait!" He got up and walked over to us.

"Well...When one door closes another one opens...So how bout it baby?" Zoë gave him a look that said, "touch me I dare you". Well apparently the dumb ass doesn't get sarcasm because he wrapped an arm around her waist pulling her into a backwards hug. I took about five feet back it was gonna get ugly.

 **WE ARE EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES PLEASE WAIT…**

My bad ass assistant was in her signature move with her heeled boot pressing into his neck.

"TOUCH ME AGAIN AND I BREAK EVERY BONE IN YOUR BODY...TWICE!" He screamed.

'Pussy.' She cleared her throat half-laughing.

"Now! Why the fuck were you following Terumi last night."

"I-I got t-this letter, it said that Terumi was a cross-dresser I wanted to see for myself."

"_ILL T_IS BA_TARD!" She rolled her eyes.

"Give me the damn note." He went to get it and she ripped it out of his hands.

"I like em' feisty." She smiled at him and kicked right in the meatballs.

"Let's go." She walked out the door and we walked straight into Jin's office.

"What?" He said coldly without even looking up.

"Where's that trash bag you call an assistant."

"Getting my coffee, why?" She walked over to his desk and handed him the note.

"What's that look like."

"A bad imitation of my hand writing."

"That's what I thought." At that moment Noel walked into the room. Jin started to spoke but Zoë stopped him. The door closed and locked behind Noel before she could close it. Noel ignored Zoë completely walked past her and gave Jin his coffee.

"Anything else Sir?"

"Ask her and make it quick I don't have all day Zoë."

"Sure asshole. Now trash-bag I mean Noel why did you write this."

 **First Ending**

"I was just so tired of all your shit Terumi!" I walked over to her.

"Always judging and making people hate me...Well I'm a fucking human being." She kicked me right in-between the legs and left crying. I would have ran after her but the pain was to strong. I looked down and saw blood. The last thing I remember was my hat falling off and Zoë laughing.

 **Second Ending**

"Sure asshole. Now trash-bag I mean Noel why did you write this."

"I didn't write this."

"Sure you didn't."

"N-No really I didn't." I looked her in the eyes she was telling the truth.

"I quit were never gonna find the person that did this."

"W-What."

"I have more important things to do anyway." I walked out of the room and out of the building. When I got home I walked to my room and shut the door and locked it. I walked over to my closet and took out a neon green dress with a pair of black pumps and took out a long neon green colored wig.

"Now...To try out my new wig." I went to the bathroom and put the outfit on. I looked delicious, my juicy thighs, and two words "DAT ASS". How would anyone keep their hands off me. My dress really captured my womanly figure.

 **Third Ending**

"I-I-I-"

"It doesn't matter." What the hell was she talking about.

"What happened to you was gonna happen or worse so in a matter of speaking whoever did this just got you prepared for worse to come."

"I wish I could fire you...You know what goodbye." I walked out of the room and slammed the door.

 **Jin P.O.V.**

"We did it Noel."

"Yes!" Noel and Zoë high-fived and Noel turned and Zoë wiped her hand off on her shirt. You see we had been planning this for months we were sick and tired of Terumi's shit we all had our reasons. Noel tired of being used and called flat-chested. Zoë just hoping it might mellow him out and maybe help him become a better person. Me, I was just tired of all that damn singing. That bastard finally got what we deserved. Zoë took out a bottle of champagne and three glasses.

"Let celebrate."

 **What the heck did I ever just write, like I really had the time to write that and that's the sad truth. The sadder truth is that some people are reading this dribble I call writing. Any-who I know its past St. Patrick's Day but I started this and I wanted to finish it, but I'm sick so have any excuse. So please comment tell me which ending is your favorite and check out my other story.**


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